10. All the sound equipment is labeled, "My First Sony."
9. The smoke machine is just a chain smoking techie.
8. Even after the actor picks up the phone, the stage manager continues to yell, "Ring, ring, ring...."
7. The hazer smells more like marajuana than burnt oil.
6. The set looks suspiciously like the set designer's one room apartment.
5. The follow-spot is manufactured by 'Mag-light'.
4. Gelling an instrument requires 12 gel sample books and large amounts of scotch tape.
3. There are only four possible light intensities: Guinea pig, hampster, gerbil, and mouse.
2. The headset system consists of tin cans and string.

1. Two weeks before tech, you learn that the theater is condemned, and your show will be performed in the scene shop instead.



This top ten list was concocted by a freshman theater major at the
University of Maryland: Jeremy Goldman -- jgoldma@wam.umd.edu